New Years Honours List

Biggest Losers for 2010

CRICKET: Lost the T20 to England, lost the One Day Series to England, lost the Test Series to England, lost the ashes for a third time to England. Biggest Loser Gold Medal.

Honorable Efforts

KEVIN RUDD: Toppled as prime minister in his first term by his deputy Julia Gillard. Rudd stepped

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Cocaine Yes, Bubble Gum No

No Bubble Gum

As police hand back embarrassing cellphone footage of rugby league stars doing illegal drugs offenders chewing gum in class are not given such leniency. Sh!t no.

Source …Read Full Story

Jailed for bursting gum STEVE BUTCHER June 18, 2010

A GUM-CHEWING 20-year-old from Dandenong was yesterday jailed by a magistrate for

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Ausfailure loses to Scotland for first time since 1982

Wallabies Captain Rocky Elsom Says Team Is Not Full Of Meatheads

While the world laughs uncontrollably at the growing list of Ausfailure’s sporting disasters teams that usually struggle to beat the Ockers are lining up to thrash the daylights out of them.

Take their Two Time Rugby World Cup winning team. The Wallabies used

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OSWALD P WRONG SECURES WORLD CHAMPION TIPPING STATUS

Oswald P Wrong – World Champion Tipster

Oswald P Wrong has been declared the champion tipster following his complete and utter annihilation of his opponents in the 2007 season NR-Hell competition.

To mark this achievement The Oswald P Wrong Official Fan Club released this special commemorative T-shirt for losers to wear.

T Shirts are

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Ausfailure Adopts New Flag Following Second Tri Nations Humiliation

Ausfailure Adopts New Flag

Ausfailure today announced that it was adopting a new flag in recognition of it’s sporting woes over the last 2 years. The flag fittingly replaces all the stars with asterisks on the current flag.

Humilitated by New Zealand in 2005 in the Tri Nations final where Willy Mason

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Australia or Ausfailure?

Australians were to day reeling from yet another humiliation on the sports field as their alleged world champion rugby league team succumbed to a 4th string Kiwi team in Sydney on Saturday night.

The Kiwis chances were weakened as usual by various skulduggery by the fear fueled Australian tryhards but as usual this did not

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Kiwis Announce 4th String Team To Play Australia

New Zealand today was allowed to announce it’s rugby league team to play Australia in the upcoming Tri-Nations series.

The team is: Brent Webb, Jake Webster, Paul Whatuira, Clinton Toopi, Manu Vatuvei, Nigel Vagana, Stacey Jones, Paul Rauhihi, Lance Hohaia, Ruben Wiki, David Kidwell, Frank Pritchard and Louis Anderson.

On the bench are David Faiumu,

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2003 Season Preview

Bluey Crackersport Reports From New Zealand

With just a couple of days to go before season 2003 kicks off there have already been several casualties.

Craig Coleman was given the bums rush at Souths after continuing in the Souths tradition of losing heaps of games in a row.

“Tradition is all very well when it

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NR-HELL Move Into New Offices

HR-Hell HQ

The NR-Hell today advised that judicial shaftings will now take place at the new purpose built head office for the NR-Hell Jokediciary.

The building is situated at 14 Grovellenbeg Street, Central Sydney.

A spokes person for the NR-Hell said the building was designed by a leading architect and was meant to express

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Warriors Stick It Up NZRL

The New Zealand Warriors scored first blood this week and it wasn’t on the football field, but rather in the pockets of their former financial partner and co-owner, the NZRL. In a move reminiscent of the finest tradition of Aussie league and it’s ability to stick one up the Kiwis, the new New Zealand Warriors

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Field Goals To Be Outlawed?

Queensland league officials are today howling loudly and calling for field goals to be outlawed from the game as the shock of losing to this years wooden spoon certainties the New Zealand Warriors settles in.

The Kiwis were level pegging with the real footballers until a Stacey Jones drop goal in the closing minutes of

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Authorities Appeal For Publics Help

John Doe

Rockhampton Police are today appealing to the public for help in identifying a John Doe who has turned up on their doorstep penniless and looking for a place to stay.

Police feel sure that someone somewhere will know the man and hope by publishing the photo someone somewhere will be able to

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